In a cafe:
A: Is that stone around your neck real turquoise?
B: Sure, I got it from this girl in Brazil.
A: That is the biggest f---in' stone I ever seen.
B: Yeah, man, it's epic.
On the sidewalk:
A: Hey, I gotta go. Dancing with the Stars is on tonight.
B: Oh, you watch that?
A: Of course. We're all voting for Bristol.
B. Bristol Palin! Why? She can't dance.
A: Cause we just LOVE that family, that whole family! They're really something.
Two white middle-aged guys blocking the isle in a health food store:
A is blabbing on and on and on... blah blah blah blah blah....about some mystic kind of new age evolved something or other. B listens patiently but finally interrupts.
B: You sure that's true?
A. Of course it's true. I should know because I'm a kahuna.
A: You didn't know that, did you? That I'm a kahuna. I am, you know.
B. (More silence)
A. You don't believe me? Why don't you believe me? I am a kahuna, you know, for real.
B. Okay. Then say something in Hawaiian.