THE 32 MARKS OF THE BUDDHA

"32 Marks of the Buddha" (detail), mixed media and found objects on wood, 2008

The photo shows the inside of a small wooden altar.  Somehow I don't seem to have a picture of the whole piece.  I was inspired just by the idea of a buddha having 32 (not 33 or 77, but precisely 32!) distinguishing marks  Here is the list of his 32 marks.  Try reading it as if it were a poem.

1. He has feet with a level sole
2. He has the mark of a thousand-spoked wheel on the soles of his feet
3. He has projecting heels 
4. He has long fingers and toes 
5. His hands and feet are soft-skinned 
6. He has net-like lines on palms and soles 
7. He has high raised ankles
8. He has taut calf muscles like an antelope 
9. He can touch his knees with the palms of his hands without bending
10. His sexual organs are concealed in a sheath, producing smegma which has a fragrant odor 
11. His skin is the color of gold
12. His skin is so fine that no dust can attach to it
13. His body hairs are separate with one hair per pore 
14. His body hair is blue-black and curls in clockwise rings
15. He has an upright stance 
16. He has the seven convexities of the flesh 
17. He has an immense torso like that of a lion 
18. The furrow between his shoulders is filled in 
19. The distance from hand-to-hand and head-to-toe is equal 
20. He has a round and smooth neck 
21. He has sensitive taste-buds 
22. His jaw is like that of lion's 
23. He has a nice smile
24. His teeth are evenly spaced 
25. His teeth are without gaps in-between 
26. His teeth are quite white
27. He has a large, long tongue 
28. He has a voice like that of a Brahma
29. He has sapphire blue eyes 
30. He has eyelashes like an ox 
31. He has a white soft wisp of hair in the center of the brow 
32. His head is like a royal turban 

The list confirms that I have a long way to go before I'd be recognized as a buddha.  Nevertheless, I keep hoping.  Of course, the smegma part is a bit of a problem.